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2012.12.26

恋愛相手への評価

恋愛は恋すると言う事から始まり、恋を維持する過程で混乱する。

誰しも自分の思い描く理想の基準を持っているのだとすれば、それに近い相手を求めるのは当然であり、恋する時点では合格点を越えているはずなのである。

しかし恋愛が始まると、知らずのうちに自分の基準で相手を評価していってしまう。
付き合う事になって初めてわかる事は多々あるのだが、こういうところが思っていた点と違うと言うようなことがマイナス評価されていくのである。

ここが問題なのだが「思っていた点」と言うのは自分の判断であるから、言い換えれば「思い込み」なのである。
そこは見極めきれていなかったと言う事になる。
とは言え相手のすべてを見極めるのはほぼ不可能であると思われるからやっかいなのだ。

評価の角度を今一度変えてみるのも一つの手である。
通常は言うなれば数学的採点の方式をとってしまう。

数学であれば、途中の式を間違っていればマイナスされるし、答えが違えば否応もなしに×である。
ところが芸術ならば「そういうのも有りかな」となる事もある。
もちろん、全く話にならんと言う事もあるのだが。

ただしこれは中身の評価に一考を加えるのも恋愛の維持には役に立つかもと言う事であって、外観が無防備に変貌してきた等と言う点に関しては角度の変えようがないので容赦してもらえないと思う。

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Comments

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ご無沙汰でしたね~!!
お元気だったのかしら?


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これからも、

それなりに頑張りますわ(*^ー゚)b

>yasuko 明けてしまいました(笑)本年も宜しくです。

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